CALCIFER
In this battle, your outcome's looking pretty dismal.
I'm shining like a gemstone, you can call me Billy Crystal.
I refuse to be exploited, but I've got this single hitch,
Spawning T-shirts and merchandise up your arse, bitch!
The scary and powerful fire demon is scorching your raps
My contract allows me to incinerate your turgid angel chap.
Is fomenting discord all you know? You're a nuisance.
You're so utterly inept even Mandrake would think you useless.
CROWLEY
Had you not eaten Howl's heart, you'd have been minced.
All you do is sit around the castle doling out hints
I saved the world from the Apocalypse, you elf.
I even designed London's very motorway itself.
Adam would agree that you're not exactly Daryan
We won't forget the time you fought the Librarian.
I'll pour holy water on you while I'm on the go
Your creator was an antiquated hazbin hoe!
Let's face it, you weren't exactly a beauty
But Ghibli came along and made you a cute little cutie!
CALCIFER
Right, now that you've bruised my ego, let's dance.
I mean, what is it with you and your obsession with plants?
I'm hinting disapprovingly, just call me James Frownwoods
'Cos I fell from the sky, you just 'sauntered vaguely downwards'.
In terms of who’s a better demon, there’s really no contest
I’m a well-rounded character and that makes me the best.
Your creators named you after a notorious occultist
They couldn't have possibly gotten any more pissed.
Me! Lubbock-killing MC, meanie blue-and-greeny
You, adviser to Shakespeare, turncoat, gang member
Might as well have been a djinn or genie!
CROWLEY
You’re just Sophie’s bitch, and you’re vulnerable to water
Led a fellow daemon like a lamb to the slaughter
I'm practically the hero, you're just a hanger-on
Practically bullied by an old biddy to cook on.
I'm an MC brimming with brimstone and fire
I'll throw water on you to douse you out of ire
I drove through my handiwork, hated the flood
You're just a mere flame of a dud.
The Grand Council would prefer to brand you a nutter
But they all say - SO LONG SUCKER!
No comments:
Post a Comment